Well I am doing better. I cut down on side jobs a bit because it was too much. Hubby and I started a meal plan and I am toying with joining Gym Pact after we return from our planned vacation. I'm also considering doing things outside the house get a much needed change of scenery.

Things will be fine. The money bought me time and I'm still adjusting.

I was happy note that it's been almost a year since I paid off the credit cards and stopped paying interest on revolving balances. And if my side jobs keep going this way I'll be able pay off my smallest student loan sometime next year. And overall the principal balance has dropped below 17K which is nice.

I bought an ice cream machine and will probably get a pasta maker soon and I learned how make pizza at home which made me pretty happy. All that should save us a ton in take out and I'm happy try all kinds of new neat desserts.

I am not doing so well. Everyday I try to go to sleep at a good time. I have two goals everyday. Do something that leads to a new contract/more money and work out to get in better shape.

Every day I get up and the house is a mess or there is no food. I say no problem I'll go to the store and make something and clean up the mess. But then the dogs have to go out. I take them out, clean the mess and say okay after this I'll buy the food to cook and get started with my day.

Then I log on the computer and hours go by because I found some files I want to fix or some new article to read and it goes on. Now I am starving and I've gotten no work done or working out. Now I am so hungry I'm afraid to drive to get food. Then I say well I can't work out and the day is shot so why bother doing anything productive.

I have been getting better about getting out of the funk but I hate it and its consuming all my lead time before I have to increase my hours at my part-time job to keep my husband happy so he gets off my back about money.

I feel all this invisible pressure. I keep trying to make a food plan a work out plan a money money plan but it continues to fall through.

This is more of a vent because things are getting better a bit but its sad that I am this mean to myself. I need to set myself up for success not failure. Why fail when I haven't even really begun yet?

I went to my last class and it was so helpful now I am super happy that I made the investment into this kind of camera.

I can just think of all the pictures I can take all the memories I could capture. I can't get accessories yet but as soon as my next check comes in I can buy things for it again Anyone else enjoying their Christmas toys?

Now that my credit card debt is gone I can finally focus again on saving. And I'm short. I'm short on my three months goals. I'm short on my Christmas goal, gift fund goal etc.

It's frustrating. It feels like I cannot get it sorted out before this job ends and like I can't seem to win and have to be stuck of off living off of nothing for a while longer.

But then I think wow my credit card debt really is gone. I really can pay out an extra car payment each month and still save for goals for as long as I am employed.

Today was a pain and so was last week as I had some unexpected expenses. But they are taken care of which feels pretty good. And I am still credit card debt free today. I guess as someone had said on the blog comments. I need to let this accomplishment set in before I freak out about the next.

I've been stuck with that debt for so long most of the years since I turned 18, that I need to relearn things. I'm just so programmed into the payments its become a bad habit. Guess its just time to replace it with a new one like putting that money toward paying off my darn car, or just really breathing easy that as long as I keep my savings high, the credit card nightmare is finally over. Just hoping I can plug those savings gaps.

I have accomplished a lot and I just need to remember to take it one step at a time. It took years to rack up the debt, and years to pay it off. Building up my savings will take a while too. I just need to be patient.